Last Friday, I had a coaching call with a client, and the reason for, and as such the solution for her issue, turned out to be very different than expected.
So here we go….that was her problem:
What's the next step in my career?
How do I find what's right for me?
I asked her: What have you done so far to solve the issue?
Her answer was that tt was mainly activities on a superficial level: She checked out industries/jobs and looked into options in consultancy. All good.
Then she suddenly said: "Somehow, I feel that I procrastinate".
Interesting development. And of course, I was interested in the WHY because I knew that would give her additional insights.
Digging deeper - the underlying fears came out:
* Fear that there is nothing out there for her - resulting in being a failure
* Fear not finding the right thing -and being left behind by her "successful" social circle
* Fear of the next step not being perfect
* The fear to fail in her own expectations to achieve "something big"
Then we explored WHY it was so important to find "the right" thing NOW. An immense pressure SHE had built up for herself.
It turned out that the whole family is one of high achievers - resulting in the belief:
"Only when I'm productive, I'm worthy".
What a massive, limiting belief!!
Sounded very familiar to me - it's not been that long since I shifted that one!
And being worthy is connected with getting what she REALLY wanted, next to a career that pays for her life & creates an impact bigger than herself.
Going deeper again - What's the real desire?
She went along with it, knowing that she wanted a sustainable solution -not only a quick fix (…this takes courage!).
What she wanted was:
* Appreciation from others
* Status that makes her appear important and accomplished
* Confirmation that she has not failed
* Belonging to her social circle
The COMMON DENOMINATOR: wanting to feel good (about herself).
The TRICKY BIT: All of it depends on OUTSIDE sources. People and circumstances.
Things she cannot control - maybe influence at best.
Relying on those to give her the wanted feeling is a dangerous game - somebody pulls away the appreciation - it goes. She loses a great job - feeling gone.
SHIFTING ...we worked on
* Shifting the belief (productivity = worth)
* Checking in with and changing her self-talk (thoughts) that create the fears. Fear clouds judgement and decision-making massively, so the danger of taking wrong decisions then is huge.
* How she can give herself the appreciation that she needs and take responsibility for her own feelings.
" A simple strategy to find out what is really important in her next career step
All of that shifted her story MASSIVELY. And with such, how she felt.
From almost desperate & indecisive to motivated, calm and far more confident.
Trusting herself much more AND having a strategy on how to move forward.
We did all of that in 75 minutes.
#Transformation does not have to take ages. AND it is far deeper than change - in fact - #change is the result of transformation!
Looking to resolve some - maybe even re-occurring - issues or problems in your career (or life ...they tend to go hand in hand...) then I invite you to hop on a call and see what we could shift together. Maybe also in 75 minutes :-). Creating massive progress (and possibly relief) with a ripple effect for all other areas in your life.
I promise I won't send you daily mails - I might offer you great stuff from time to time though. Of course I'm biased ;-).
Thanks for your trust!